Back pretty sore. It feels like I’m bent over by the weight of bricks on my shoulders. Not being able to arch my back is killing me. If only I could just stretch…

I know I need to take some pain meds. BUT – not good to take the pills on an empty stomach. Okay, gotta eat then. BUT – nauseous also.

Okay then, cannabis for the stomach. Quick smoke. Now I have to wait for it to kick in. It helps the nausea but does nothing for my back (not with this level of aching). About 20 minutes later and I’m eating some cereal. I pop the pain med. Now gotta wait for THAT to kick in.  So far, about an hour and a half has gone by since I woke and the back pain is still there. Stomach? Better.

Goddamn this is so annoying, this fucking reliance on things outside of myself just to feel more NORMAL. I should handle this. ME, just me. I shouldn’t need to follow all these stupid routines.

Man, fuck my medicine cabinet! FUCK! FUCK! FUCK!